Invisible Load of Motherhood

What does it mean when we say there is an “invisible load of motherhood”?

Being a mom can be an extremely wonderful and rewarding experience. There is such beauty and wonder when bringing a child into your family and, most times, the joy outweighs the bad. However, moms everywhere experience a mental load that is unlike one they may have lived through before and is often much different than the thoughts a father might deal with.

Mental load refers to the invisible, mental tasks that you deal with each day. It’s the “thinking” work. What details do you manage during the day? What mental logistics do you handle? What responsibilities do you have and what decisions need to be made? Mental load is difficult to notice in others because it is completely invisible. No one can see your thoughts except for you, and only you can feel the “weight” of these intangible burdens.

A mother’s internal labor and burdens often go unnoticed. Typical decisions and thoughts that arise in a normal day of motherhood include: making appointments, scheduling after school care, planning family outings, remembering medications, planning three meals every day for multiple people, logistics to and from school and activities, housework including laundry and cleaning, birthday parties, holiday celebrations, and so on. This list does not include the mental load that comes from also having a career.

Next, we will talk about the physical and mental effects this heavy mental load can have on a mom.